Eye Contact – How?

Eye contact when talking with another person conveys sincerity, confidence and reassurance.


In Asian culture we are ‘taught’ not to look directly into an older / senior person eyes as a sign of respect.


In the ‘Western culture’ avoiding eye contact is regarded:

  • as if the person is not confident,

  • trying to hide something

  • cannot be trusted.

This leads to a significant handicap when one is in a communication settings as looking directly into another person’s eyes feels uncomfortable.


How to over come this hurdle?


My solution to the dilemma is:

When sitting across from a person at 2 – 3 feet e.g. at a communication station or consultation in out patients –

“FOCUS your gaze at the person’s SHOULDER TIP”.

To the observer it will seem you are looking at them making eye contact and for you – not having the direct gaze is more manageable and comfortable.

This does not mean you do not move your eyes at all during the discussion – move as you feel comfortable and confident.